idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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