I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
