Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
