I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
