what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Randomize
