Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
