I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
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