Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Randomize
