Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
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