I am in a vortex of obligation.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Hippo gnu deer
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
