I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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