Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
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