If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
