Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
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