Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Randomize
