Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Randomize
