He is such a slut. More and more my type.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Randomize
