I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize