Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
