yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
You dont lie about slip and slides
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Randomize
