your room smells of hookers.
And success
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
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