Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
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