I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize