As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Randomize
