Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
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