Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
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