sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Randomize
