hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
