she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
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