I think I am morally bankrupt
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Randomize