these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
