At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
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