Yo dont text me then not text me
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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