would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
