As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
