My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
