nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
