This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Randomize
