you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
