I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Randomize
