okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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