Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
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