If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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