no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
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