if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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