I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I AM VODKA MAN
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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