Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
4 words: hood of his car
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
