Say something about gay babies.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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