Don't you send me to vm
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
