we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
