I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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