Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize
